SEL Art Lesson: "I" Statements
Elementary students created Eyes as an SEL and literacy infused art project. We studied the meaning in our words and how we can express what we are authentically seeing or feeling. We used oil pastel to create "eye" statements... get it? There is also significant writing and journaling prompts that help students craft their thoughts into effective statements. created an artwork to help remember "I" statements and some even put their I feel _____ statements under their drawing. Some did not feel comfortable or aesthetically did not choose to. If you would like to skip to the art making of the lesson scroll all the way down and watch my video lessons on this topic. If you want to know my deep feelings about this lesson and how it affected me please read below. I think you should read it, though - I promise it is good information. This was a collaboration with a fourth grade teacher.
I wanted to share this lesson that I created for Fourth Grade. As a whole team, the teachers and leadership at my campus would agree that student "drama" is a challenge for educators. Many of our students feel so emotional and sensitive that sometimes their arguments are unhealthy and lead to conflict rather than a change. We all want our students to learn the critical life skills of making arguments and conversations that express concerns without creating unnecessary conflict. I hear this frequently:
"This sucks."
"Nobody likes me."
"Nobody cares about me."
"She's the worst friend ever."
"My parents are trying to ruin my life."
"I am not good at this."
"I will never understand this."
While these statements sound dramatic, hence "drama", our students are very aware of their emotions but don't always use the language to express them in a healthier way. These may be situations that seem insignificant to us but because these kids are so fresh to life - this "drama' might feel overwhelming to them. As an adult, I learned about "I" statements a couple years ago. It is how adults and children alike can express what they truly mean to say. Let's say that one student is exhausted of another student talking over an instructor. A student may feel so bottled up and exhausted that they blurt "Stop talking over the teacher -you're so annoying!". Now, even though this expressed one person's point of view it will likely never fix the conflict, lead to more conflict, and both parties will be in the wrong.
I statements are crafted to express the most authentic feelings without resulting in further conflict. Here is how they are constructed:
I feel________ when you ______ because__________. What I need is ____________.
There's been times where a student with emotional challenges has said "you just want me to be quiet." or I can tell that a student feels like I don't want to hear what they have to say. I will admit, during the chaos of the day, the pacing of our lessons, it is easy to say "stop talking" or "Stop doing that". The truth is that I do want them to stop that behavior....right now....in THIS situation. If you want to tap your pencil like a drum on the desk, fine... but not during my lesson while I am teaching. I do want you to talk about your scores in Fortnite, but when you're at recess or at the lunch table, or even with me after you are done with your work. We need to be specific about what we are asking for because these students can take what we say the wrong way or completely literally. Why? Because they are children. For them, an emotion is more painful and real because they have experienced so little of life - and I cannot blame them for that. I was the same way. I have to remember that some of my students have only been walking the earth for five years! Of course, they do not have the language to express difficult and complicated emotions. I need to show them how.
So now let's rephrase something with an "I" statement. Roger decides to talk over me during a lesson. I give him a warning with a look. He stops. He continues a few seconds later with a smile on his face. I clear my throat. He stops. Again, I see him talking and laughing with a friend. Instead of disrupting the lesson further and making myself possible unavailable or creating conflict by addressing this in front of the class, I wait until the class begins our independent practice. I would ask both students involved rather just one who was creating a disruption to meet me privately. With as many situations that educators work through on a daily basis it would be easy to say something like "I'm tired of you talking over me. Why aren't you getting this?" because its so easy for a teacher to think that the situation is ME versus THEM. However, the environment these coversations create are not what we would want in our classroom. So let's try rephrasing...
"I feel annoyed when I am disrupted during my lesson because I want everyone to have access to the information in my classroom. What I need is for you to please keep others in mind when I am teaching a lesson."
I told that student that I do not appreciate any behavior that disrupts my lesson - not just his. Think about this, what do you TRULY want your students to know about the challenging behavior? Is this a behavior that is okay sometimes but not others? Is this a behavior that is okay but not in the specific way that they have shown? Is this something that would be helpful in another area but not in the current situation?
These SEL "I" statements are helpful for reinforcing positive behavior as well.
It is easy as an art teacher for me to say "good job", "beautiful!", or "keep it up!" and I forget to mention the specifics about quality work or reinforced behavior that are key to creating understanding in the conversation. Stephanie walks into the room without putting her hands on her best friend Stephanie. I usually have to repeat "We keep our hands to ourselves." over and over but today she has shown she can follow expectations without any reminders or redirection. I could say "Great job today!" but even though it is positive it doesn't actually express why I am happy with what I saw or even prove that I noticed anything the child did.
So let's rephrase:
"Stephanie, I am feeling so proud today because I saw you entering the room and following expectations. I hope that other students can be more like you because this shows me that you are listening and that you really care about our classroom."
Done. My point came across. No confusion. Stephanie not only knows that I saw a new behavior but I have proved that it actually mattered.
When a student uses contrast, value, emphasis or any element or principle of art I try to point it out. I try not to say "Nice" or "Looks good!". I need to point out that specific trait about the student work.
"You used a lot of color!"
"Wow, you used your watercolor techniques and created a balanced composition."
"You correctly cleaned your station before you left - I can see you care about our studio."
When a student hears me look at another student's artwork and say "That is beautiful." and I walk past without saying anything about theirs, automatically, the understanding is that their work is not.
To check out this lesson I will link 3 videos of me teaching this oil pastel lesson. All you need is oil pastels, a variety of skin-tone paper colored for your students, a large circular item and a smaller circular item. That's it! Enjoy.
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